lovely-attitude:

lying in my bed trying to become famous

endocrines2:

*drinks vodka* *gags* “ugh I hate vodka” *drinks vodka*

(Source: endocrines2014)

yesimstacysmom:

giraffepoliceforce:

If people are really going to assume that guys with long hair are gay and girls with short hair are lesbians then I am going to assume that all bald men are actually eagles.

I knew it, something about my dad just wasn’t adding up

cwiiis:

tbh i can’t imagine changing my vocabulary when i get older and it’s so surreal
like i’ll meet my buddies at the shuffleboard place and i’ll be all “sup fucking nerds you’re gonna get wrecked”

irenigg:

ive seen very few if any sexy models. modeling in general is not sexy i dont see how u could be attracted to a model. posing is not sexy bein aware of the camera is not sexy. candid is sexy. im sexy. im candid. im candy. eye candy. hi mandy. im randy. beach sandy. need handy.

tentakewl:

when you hear your mom coming home and remember all the chores you were supposed to do image

(Source: smackable)

eighttwotwopointthreethree:

shakespeare’s characters are more or less equally divided between “DO IT FOR THE VINE” and “YOU HAD ONE JOB”

bonus:

i like to tell people when i need to go pee

tsungere:

things to say during sex;

  • ring ding ding ding dingeringeding
  • wa pa pa pa pa pa pow
  • hatee hatee hatee ho
  • joff tchoff tchoffo tchoffo tchoff
  • jacha chacha chacha chow
  • kraka kaka kaka kaka kow
  • a hee ahee ha hee
  • a oo oo oo ooo

(Source: nam-baehyun)

unexotic:

unexotic:

is ur music ever so loud u feel like ur suffocating

update: i was having an asthma attack

swarnpert:

why the fuck is fighting weak to bug types. i’ll punch a bee, i dont give a fuck

ven0moth:

simon says send nudes

silenthillone:

people who have gym first period

image

urtube:

Two latino men accidentally touch hands

no hombre